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Shameless – we all screwed up…

Hello Ladybugs,

It’s me: T (lady Sergine’s assistant)! Today, I want to share something with you. It might be helpful, who knows?

It’s been days since I’ve been binge-watching an American comedy series, Shameless, that my brother got me into. It’s an interesting one and believe it or not, one can learn through it. Well, for those who do not watch or have any idea of it, it’s mostly about the Gallaghers, precisely six poor siblings who live in the South Side (ghetto part) of Chicago and depend on all kind of subterfuges and felonies like scams and robberies to survive. Their parents are a narcissistic alcoholic/drug addict, and a bipolar/drug addict/alive but absent mother. One more thing that is relevant to say is that the oldest sibling, Fiona, had to dropped out of high school to take care of the rest of the clan. Further in the show, at the age of 21, she even became her siblings’ legal guardian to keep them out of the foster care system.

Last night, while I was watching the series, one episode particularly got me thinking. It was essentially about how often we fail to acknowledge the role we play when situations happen to us. Fiona messed up bad: her littlest sibling, Liam, who is only two or three years old snorted like a gram of cocaine under her watch at her birthday party. Thanks to God, he survived it but with some brain damages. I was myself surprised since throughout the series, Fiona is that big, responsible and protective sister who has sacrificed her youth for her siblings’ well-being. How could she let that happened? I was a bit pissed at her because she should have known better, right? Then, a question popped in my head, “Would you know better T, if it was you?”

Fiona was at a period of her life where she couldn’t refrain herself from ruining good things that kept coming her way because in her opinion and her surrounding’s: Once you are a Gallagher, you don’t deserve anything but bad luck and hard times. She was completely lost and overwhelmed. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to justify her lack of responsibility at that moment, which stays inexcusable, but at times, we just can’t judge someone else’s life that is so different from ours. God knows that it is in the human nature to do so! I keep repeating myself that it would never happen to me because first, I wouldn’t ever be in possession of drugs, and secondly, I would have watched after my brother closely; however, I forgot that it doesn’t have to be drugs… what about alcohol? I love liquors. What about the fact that toddlers are sneaky? In a fraction of few seconds, they can be everywhere. I realized that sometimes, things can be out of control and that ONE big mistake among a lot of good deeds can turn one’s life upside down. Fiona had never been incarcerated but now she has a criminal record, which makes it harder for her to find a good job on top of not having a degree. Moreover, because of her negligence, Liam’s brain doesn’t function properly.

When the police and ambulance arrived that night, Fiona claimed that she didn’t see Liam or didn’t even think that he was there (to be noted that the party was at her house, and only five of them were present including Liam). She kept saying that she isn’t guilty of anything or it was JUST an accident and that she wasn’t THE ONE who brought the cocaine. Though, she was the first who snorted it. Since then, Fiona lost her credibility and authority before her siblings for a while. The one that follows her, Lip, couldn’t trust her anymore around Liam; he had to take him everywhere he went, even at college until Fiona recognized and accepted that she was in fact, to blame for what happened.

See, assuming is important because when you do, you allow yourself to learn and grow out of it. It also reassures and helps the healing process (psychologically speaking) of the people who got hurt in any type of way because of what happened. Fiona refused to accept that she, the loving and responsible sister that she is, has a major part of fault in what happened. She was in total denial because the one time that she got her guard down, something that horrible occurred.

Everybody could have been in her place. And, we all had been Fiona-ted at some point in our life. Maybe not the exact situation but believe me, we had. Try to think back.

To finish, I’m just going to leave you with those words that Fiona’s probation officer said: “We all screwed up in one way or the other. You’re a grown up, there’s come a point in time that you got to take control of your own life. Whatever you are from, whoever did you wrong or didn’t do what they were supposed to do or wasn’t being who they were supposed to be, it’s just YOU. No more excuses.”

 

Sincerely,

 

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